When I was active in STAR TREK fandom, we
used a phrase to describe the need to stop having fun and return to the world
of adult responsibilities—“life intrudes”.
As in, “No, dude, I can’t [attend the next con/participate in the
costume contest/
practice for the filking performance], life intrudes.” It meant we had to attend to the real world tasks of earning a living, taking care of the family, feeding the dog or cat.
practice for the filking performance], life intrudes.” It meant we had to attend to the real world tasks of earning a living, taking care of the family, feeding the dog or cat.
I’ve noticed since then that lots of geeky
groups use the phrase—fans of graphic narrative (uh, that would be comics to
the rest of us), gamers, re-enactors of all stripes and, oh, yes, romance
writers. Not all of us are geeky, mind
you, but we all live in some alternate universe of fantasy, where all the women
are empowered and all the men incredibly handsome AND sensitive. We’d stay there indefinitely, except the kids
just keep asking to be fed for some reason.
Life intrudes.
In my case this summer, life has intruded in
a major way. Not exactly like Godzilla
intruded on Tokyo, because all of the life events I’m experiencing are
positive. I’m grateful for them,
truly. Still, they are all-encompassing,
commanding not only my time and attention, but also my emotional energy, which
is much more devastating to the concentration one needs for writing.
So what’s going on?
--I’m
moving. Huge disruption here. My husband and I are selling the home we’ve
owned for 18 years, clearing out the detritus of over 120 combined years of
existence on the planet, 38 years of marriage, two kids and multiple pets. Yes, that’s right, we’re downsizing. That means a
decision must be made about every photo, knick-knack, bauble, tool, piece of
furniture and item of décor. It’s not
only physically exhausting, it’s mentally brutal. If I were the sentimental type, which
thankfully I’m not, it would be emotionally crushing.
Still, we found buyers for our house after
having the place on the market for only a month. We located a nice house to rent for the next
year before we move down to North Carolina to start building our dream
house. So, you know what? It’s all good. I’ll try not to trip over the boxes in the
dark and be grateful the local landfill is just a short drive away.
--My
youngest daughter is getting married.
I don’t mean she’s going to a justice of the peace to get hitched. I mean she’s putting on a formal shindig
worthy of mention in the same paragraph with Will and Kate or Kim and
Kanye. But only to say that those
couples were extravagant morons when it came to wedding stuff, while my
sensible daughter is keeping her special day well within bounds. Still, formal weddings take a LOT of planning
and time, what with multiple dress fittings and cross-state hunts for
appropriate undergarments (!).
Fortunately for me, my daughter has things under control. My main function seems to be Sturdy Shoulder
for those times when It All Becomes Too Much.
But, again, she’s marrying a great guy, and they’ll be happy. Al we have to do is get through October 5.
There are some other long-simmering issues
that have finally been resolved this summer, too, which I won’t go into. Suffice it to say that they needed time and
attention, but it was well worth it to accomplish a goal my family has been
pursuing for over five years. Now we’re
adjusting to a new, happier reality, and that takes emotional energy, too.
Never for a moment am I forgetting that I
have my first book coming out in six months.
Or that a second book will need to be polished and prepared for
publication six months after that. One
reason we decided to sell the house now, rather than next spring, was so I
could concentrate on promotion, rather than packing, once the book comes out. But there’s no question, life has intruded on
my writing in a big way. I’m stuck in
the middle of the first draft of a short story meant to get out there ahead of
the publication of Unchained Memory. Arrgh! Laurie was kind enough to send
feedback on my third book that I haven’t even had time to look at. Sorry, Laurie! I’ll get this blog in,
but I’ll neglect to respond to comments.
So sorry, dear readers!
I know I’m not the only one for whom the
obligations of real life form obstacles to our work. In most cases, the real world is not at all
benign in snatching us away from our lovely alternate universes. Laurie has shared with us just recently her
personal challenges. Sharon has
certainly had frightening, life-altering intrusions to overcome. Even Stephen King, whose 363-days-a-year work
ethic is legendary, eventually had to face reality when a distracted van driver
knocked him off the road and nearly into the next world.
The only remedy we have for this inevitable
fact of the writers’ life is to recognize the intrusions as temporary, deal
with them as best we can and get back to work as soon as possible. Moving day is September 7; we close on the
house September 12. I should be settled
into the new place and back to work before the wedding on October 5. Then, after it’s all over, my daughter says
we deserve a spa day. Just the thing to
get the old creative juices flowing again.
P.S. Happy First Birthday to my granddaughter! Little Lana is quite the diva, a delight to all who know her.
P.S. Happy First Birthday to my granddaughter! Little Lana is quite the diva, a delight to all who know her.
Cheers, Donna
I sometimes think real life is WHY we retreat to a fantasy one! Good luck with the move.
ReplyDeleteHope the move goes well! I suspect we'll be doing something similar in the next year or so.
ReplyDeleteI agree, Pippa. Maybe that's why we start to feel so crazy when we get out of the writing routine! And thanks to both of you for the good wishes.
ReplyDeleteI can so totally relate to life intruding on writing (says the person who's been MIA for the last three weeks due to the trials and tribulations of her day job).
ReplyDeleteThis too shall pass and you'll be back at it soon. But I know It can be so frustrating when life yanks us out of our self-created universes!
It sounds like you've done a fantastic planning job on your upcoming author launch, so kudos on the best possible timing--and hang in there!
Good luck on the move, Donna! I am one of those people who agonizes when packing - what I still need, what I don't - and find the whole thing overwhelming. Therefore I do it as infrequently as possible. But this must be an exciting time for you, as well. Such a major shakeup, when things have settled a bit, could even give you a creative boost!
ReplyDelete