Sunday, February 6, 2011

Six Sentence Sunday

Back for another week of Six Sentence Sunday.  Be sure to click on the link to read all the other great six sentence snippets available this week. 

If you'd like to read my previous Six Sentence Sunday posts leading up to this one, click here.

For this week's installment of Six Sentence Sunday, I'm posting another excerpt from my Near Future SFR, The Outer Planets.  In previous weeks, we met the heroine, Lissa Bruce and got a glimpse into her thoughts as she joined the Bradley mission and came face-to-face with the man she thought she'd left behind on Earth.  With her identity and appearance changed, Mitch doesn't recognize her as the woman he loves--Jenae Bradley.

This week, we see things from Mitch's POV for the first time.
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There’s something about her…

Mitch stared down at his deck boots and puzzled over the new arrival as the lift carried him back to main deck. He’d never had a woman take such an instant dislike to him. Her body language said it all -- averted eyes, a hesitation to shake his hand, her strained words.

Still.

There was that something.

An intangible feeling that resonated on some deep level. Why?

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Psssst. Want to read more of this scene?  Click here.

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38 comments:

  1. Uh-oh! She's going to have to be very, very careful!

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  2. Very nice, I can feel his frustration! I don't know the rest of the story, but this definitely makes me want to read more.

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  3. Okay, so I had to read the rest. Poor guy. He's heartbroken. Wonder if he'll ever find out. Can't wait to read more.

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  4. Perfect, griping lines. The unease Mitch feels is clear, the show that something's off with the woman who can't face him. Lovely excerpt, Laurie. Cant wait until Outer Planets hits the shelves.

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  5. I bet he had the feeling she'd love to have run - if she wasn't sitting in a spaceship! Very nice, Laurie.

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  6. Nice snippet! Good job showing his feelings

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  7. Love this peek at Mitch. Especially having read the last few weeks in her POV. Great six!

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  8. Thanks, everyone, for your great comments and feedback.

    Wow, you're early birds this morning! I better get busy. :)

    @ Chrystalla. Hi! Good to see you join the SSS gang.

    @ Arlene and Barbara. Thanks so much for all your input into this story. It's come a long way from the first draft. :)

    @ Sarah. Thanks for returning to read more of The Outer Planets.

    @ Jessica. Glad you were intrigued enough to read the rest of the except. :)

    @ Pippa Jay and Sandra. Thanks for your comments.

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  9. I like the way you showed instead of told. I'd want to read more.

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  10. I feel for Mitch. I love his sensitivity

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  11. This gets more and more interesting! I can't wait to see more!

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  12. lol, you got me. Had to click for more. Great internal conflict.

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  13. I'm very intrigued! Great snippet. I'm already looking forward to reading more next week.

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  14. You know I've got the habit of waiting for these sentences from Outer Planets each week, Laurie!
    I love this!

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  15. @ Cate Thank you for reading on! Glad you liked it. Your six had the same effect on me. Had to go check out your trailer and casting call. :)

    @ Jayelkaye Mitch's sensitivity is a big part of his character. I call him an understated alpha.

    @ Kaye Thanks so much. Really gives me a boost to hear you enjoy my work. :)

    @ Lisa Fox and heatherthurmeier Thank you! Glad you want to read more. My snippet next week will put a bit of a spin on things. *evil grin*

    @ Edie and Taryn -- Thanks for your comments. Glad you enjoyed my excerpt.

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  16. love a guy who can actually read body language

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  17. @ Claire Oh, I agree. I think there's something very compelling about a very perceptive male. :)

    Thanks for your thoughts.

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  18. Love his internal conflict...drawn to what he cannot yet identify.

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  19. @ A.R. Norris. Thank you! :)

    @ Marsha A. Moore Oh yes, glad that was clear. His observations are clashing with his instincts.

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  20. I love this story, Laurie. Did you finishs the final tweaks?

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  21. ohhh, very nice.

    The conflict this implies is fabulous! Looking forward to the next installment.

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  22. Oh, I love the way this is going. She hates him and he has no idea why. Poor guy.

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  23. @ D L Jackson. Uh, not quite yet. It's become one of those "continuous loop" sorta things, but...getting closer to a full debug, I think.

    @ mariedees Not hate, just horrified resistance. LOL

    @ Trish Thank you! It's been fun--and sometimes maddening--to write this twisted tale of star-crossed lovers. Or in their case, planet-crossed.

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  24. Oops, meant to also say "thanks" @D L Jackson and @mariedees for reading and commenting. I really appreciate it.

    Thanks to you @Alanna Coco

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  25. Had to click for more!
    Poor guy. I'm pulling for his HEA!

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  26. Thanks @Ella Drake.

    LOL Well, it is SFR, so they'll have to reach that inevitable HEA. Or HFN or HUT (Happy Until Sequel). :)

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  27. Great hook. Can't wait to read more.

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  28. I can't get enough space adventure. Sounds great and I'll add this to my TBR list.

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  29. Thank you. :) @ Emily Cale and GraylinFox

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  30. I love SFRs, I hope to see more of it.

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  31. Had to click for more. Love the setup and want to know what happens.

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  32. Great post! Can't wait to read more.

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  33. I love his uncertainty. Nice six!

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  34. Is he so sure she dislikes him? heh-heh! Great six!

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  35. awesome six! It's great to see his reaction. Do they get together again??

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