JUST MAKING IT ALL UP, FOLKS!

I had always thought I lacked the brain power to write straight romantic suspense. You know, dropping all those little clues along the way to lead the reader in the right direction, but not giving the villain away until the last spine-chilling moment. That’s difficult enough when you can throw in the odd alien or two for distraction; it’s well-nigh impossible when you’re working with your everyday human serial killer. And, apparently romantic suspense contest judges agree with me. I’ve tried numerous times and failed to even place in the prestigious Daphne du Maurier RS contest run by the Kiss of Death chapter of Romance Writers of America®.

 

You don't need real-life experience to imagine a killer.

Now it appears it wasn’t brain power I was lacking, but, um, hands-on research. As if romance writers don’t have enough to contend with these days, headlines this week featured a self-pubbed author in Oregon who’d been arrested in the murder of her husband of 27 years. Turns out the woman, Nancy Crampton-Brophy, writes “steamy” romantic suspense novels, and had even written an essay a few years back titled, “How to Murder Your Husband.” Since the murder investigation is ongoing, the news reporters were unable to say whether the murder of Crampton-Brophy’s husband shared either motive or modus operandi with those described in the author’s article.

I have no opinion one way or the other on Crampton-Brophy’s guilt. But I would bet good money that her lawyer will certainly say at some point in the proceedings, “Surely, your Honor, you wouldn’t think my client would be so stupid as to write this article, THEN go out and actually MURDER HER HUSBAND, now would you?”

Or would she? Hmm.

The problem here, of course, is that your average “mundane” believes we write out of direct experience. Our writerly lives must be glamorous! Our sex lives are no doubt spectacular! I’m not complaining, (love you, honey!) but romance novels are fantasies. The men (and women) in them may have flaws, but when it comes to the bedroom, they are generally close to perfect, because that’s how we all like it. Otherwise, we’d be writing (and reading) some other kind of novel—women’s fiction, or literary fiction about a dysfunctional family, or something.

Those of us who write science fiction romance write about aliens and space ships and distant planets. Read my lips: WE HAVEN’T BEEN THERE. We are making it all up! 

I was at Shore Leave just this summer when a woman stopped at my table and scowled when she read the blurb on the back of my book. “Have you ever met anyone who was actually abducted by aliens?” she said.

“Well, no,” I answered.

“Well, now you have.” She didn’t look happy. “Not something I want to read about.”

I could believe that, actually. I did try to say that my books all have a happy ending, that the good guys always win against the Bad Guy Aliens. Didn’t help.

Not that I haven’t been tempted to fib from time to time. I can imagine the boost Ms. Crampton-Brophy’s books are getting on Amazon about now. If I came out with a story that the little Gray guys had visited me here in NC, I might manage to break out of the sales doldrums, too. For a while. Kind of an extreme promo tactic, though.

This is not me.

This is all to say that the old saw “write what you know” shouldn’t be taken literally. You don’t have to have been a victim of alien abduction to imagine what it must be like for those people. You don’t have to commit murder to put yourself in the mind of a killer. Research is useful to provide the details that provide texture and color to settings, emotions, backstory. But 90 percent of that is to kickstart your own imagination and ground it in reality. Your intuition “knows” as well as your sensory experience does. Trust that part of you when it’s not legal, sensible or possible to pick up the gun or board the ship to outer space. 

STORM UPDATE

No doubt you've seen the destruction Hurricane Florence wrought in the eastern part of North Carolina. The deluge of rain, historic storm surge and howling winds ripped through countless communities on the coast and even miles inland, flooding and isolating dozens of communities. Folks here in Madison County, though, were spared all of that, though. The storm's track ran just east of here, through Yancey County and north through Virginia. We had a few mild rain showers and no wind. The temporary refugees who had sought to escape from the east and hunker down in AirBNBs or hotels here were at least able to relax a little. Now they wait for the flood waters to recede so they can go home. Those of us who are lucky enough to live here in the mountains are grateful. 

Cheers, Donna